Merry Freakin’ Christmas
Christmas time is here. Families drawing near. Fun for all that CHILDREN call “the greatest time of year.”
Unfortunately, this year, I think I’ve officially made the jump into adulthood. I’ve decided there are two things that scream “CONGRATULATIONS! You are now an ADULT!”
The first, is when your friends start having children ON PURPOSE / it isn’t a scandal when someone your age gets pregnant. (and seriously. to all of my friends: stop getting engaged! it’s freaking me out.)
The second is when your Christmas list looks like mine.
1. Crock pot.
2. Cook book wit awesome recipes for said crock pot.
3. Vacuum cleaner.
4. Kitchen supplies (spatula, baking pans, measuring cups, etc.)
How BORING am I? But these are things I NEED and don’t want to buy for myself. And I actually AM excited about them, which is even more sad.
Mom: A very homey Christmas! :-) Welcome to adulthood!
Me: BAH! Will you get me a Barbie or something too? Just to offset this “adulthood” thing a bit?
Mom: Barbie??? Sure.
Me: Or a puppy!
Me: Seriously though. I’m gonna need a toy or something so I don’t feel so old.
Mom: You’ll find out if you’re on Santa’s good list. I don’t remember any fun things on your wish list.
Fuck you, Santa. Bring me a puppy.