Such a Pretty Fat

(Sorry, Jen Lancaster, but it’s just such a witty title…)

This is not going to be an easy post to write, seeing as I’m not very good at sharing. But I need to hold myself accountable and putting it all out there on the interwebz seems like the perfect idea. That way, all you wonderful, supportive friends of mine can come back and point to this post if I ever want to slack off. I can’t hide anymore.

I have gained weight. And I want to lose it.

Once upon a time…let’s call it High School, I looked like this:

and I thought I was “fat.” I danced pretty much constantly and ran track. I stayed in shape (plus, being young with a rockstar metabolism didn’t hurt!) without ever really setting foot in a gym.

Then college happened. And I stopped dancing. and I stopped running. And I worked 2 jobs and went to school full-time and spent the rest of my time in the theatre (sitting behind a tech table), library, or consuming empty calories from beer.

Then I graduated from college and worked full-time at a BURGER restaurant. Eating burgers and deep-fried food everyday did wonders for my body…but not in the good way. After being on my feet all day, everyday at work, the last thing I wanted to do was work out. All I wanted was to sit down at a bar and grab a beer.

It’s just so easy to get content. Why eat a salad and go for a run when I could order a pizza and cuddle on the couch and watch a movie with my boyfriend every night?

And then one day I woke up, and I looked like this:

And it’s like…how did I GET here? I don’t even recognize this person. I have no energy. I feel unhealthy. I feel unattractive. I feel unhappy.

And that was my breaking point. I WILL lose weight. And I’m posting it here because I need to be held accountable somewhere. It’s so easy to feel lazy and not want to go work out…but I need to.

My sister is getting married in May 2012. I want to have lost a significant amount of weight by then so I look good in her bridesmaid dress.

I don’t have a goal weight. Because I don’t know my weight right now. My goal is to FEEL healthy. to FEEL happy. and to FEEL attractive again.

Follow along with my workouts on DailyMile. And when I’m feeling lazy, tired, or unmotivated…#PUSHEMILY.

 

I don’t want to be the girl in those pictures anymore. 

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~ by etau on August 10, 2011.

3 Responses to “Such a Pretty Fat”

  1. I think you’re beautiful just the way you are, but you have to be happy and comfortable in your own skin. If losing weight will make you feel happier than I am here for you, love! I think you’re going to do great because you’re doing it for YOU and not for anybody else. Wubbles, darling. I’m here if you need anything at all. <3

  2. Congrats on working toward a healthier life! I like that you don’t have a goal weight in mind. That means you’re looking to build healthier habits and work toward a healthier lifestyle – which is so much more important than some number on a scale. Best of luck!

    P.S. I’m a friend of Brennan’s, not some random creep. :)

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